We hate her; I mean why would we like her? She’s the other woman for fuck sake! When she does something right or even better than you (scratch that because no one is better than you), your blood boils. You see a bond forming and it makes you want to drown yourself in a bottle of tequila. We ALL know the “other woman” all too well. It happens when you least expect it, finding out hits you like a ton of bricks. It all comes into perspective! That moment you realize…THERE’S ANOTHER WOMAN IN MY KIDS LIFE.
As single mothers we become possessive with our kids. We want to keep them to ourselves, we don’t like to share. They’re our comfort, our safe place. When you become a single parent, your “team” consists of you and your kid(s). The bond becomes stronger, those precious memories become ALL YOURS. You don’t have to share YOUR love with anyone else. You literally pour your heart and soul into your child. So of course it’s natural to become a lioness when you have to share your kids love and attention with the “other woman”.
Now we have two choices here…be a crazy baby mama (I hate that word)…or accept this person in your life because it’s what’s best for your kid(s). When I think of the other woman I always think to myself “I rather have another woman take care of my daughter as if she were her own rather than having an evil step mom.” Always think of what’s best for YOUR child. No one can ever replace us; no one can do what we do. Mom will ALWAYS be number one! Set some boundaries, talk about the dos and don’ts. Communication is key, putting differences aside and talking about YOUR child can only bring positivity into both homes.
Granted this is all easier said than done and all this is a process. If you see the bigger picture, I promise you it’s worth it. Your kid will be able to go back and forth between homes sharing stories without the fear of hurting the other parents feelings. Your kid will not feel the guilt of liking someone else in their life because they know it kills you inside. Focus on the bigger picture, a happier kid. Even though it’s so much fun to hate and blame the “other woman.” Let’s take a step back and let the other woman be a role model. Do what I do, pour yourself a glass of wine and sit back knowing your child is in good hands. While you’re at it, just Caya_Te & Live.
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